A Month For Loki: Day Thirty-one.

These thirty-one days passed so quickly, I feel they aren't exactly over yet. This month has made me think, question and change a lot - in fact, it's not surprising to say change has been a major part of it. Some wounds had to be opened to be properly treated, and others had to be stitched up and fixed at last. My biggest obstacle is still standing strong and clear, but it will be worked through. I am insecure above anything, and it causes me more pain than I should let it.

Writing in this blog has helped me both clear my ideas and feel more confident, and even though I feel I sound silly or just confuse whoever reads it, I do my best to keep everything as it is and not just delete it. In fact, I need somewhere to write about this. If there is anything that blocks me, it would be the insecurity I've held for so long, and I'm convinced I can at least lessen it by a great ammount.

Another thing July has given me is clarity in my path, showing me some things that are important to me and some that are not as much. Daily devotions are important, no matter how small, and offerings too - both material and not. I would love to list out all else, and to make this a proper, well-written closing post for the month, but right now I have been consumed by emotion. It's a form of gratitude and love, and devotion to my deities, myself and everything that supports me. Loki has taught me much on the matter of being grateful, though maybe it's a lesson from Sigyn too.

I have decided to study as much as I can about the path I choose to follow and decide exactly what suits me. It is ever-changing, that is true, but I've set a few lines that I don't suppose will be broken so soon. For once, I wouldn't call myself anything such as a reconstructionist or heathen: I stem from very neopagan roots, and am not exactly traditional as Asatruars and other heathens are. I do try to keep in-tradition and not borrow from others where I can help it, but that doesn't make me recon. I'm quite comfortable with that, actually.

And this should close the post for today, and as a side note: I might write something on deity representations in the near future.